Text used – Psalm 30
- Reminder of summer sermon series on Beatitudes
- Dive deeper into one Beatitude each week
- Paid Beatitude with another text as well as a focus word (centering prayer for the day)
- Let me preface everything I’m going to say this morning with this, friends: today’s Beatitude is a difficult one: Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.[1]
- Difficult one because mourning is difficult
- Painful
- Confusing
- Lengthy process
- Much longer than we ourselves would like it to be
- Much longer than society seems to think it should be
- Difficult because everyone’s experience of mourning is different
- Difficult because of the Hallmark-ized culture in which we live → culture in which we are bombarded by empty platitudes when people don’t know what else to say (platitudes that often have the opposite effect from the comfort intended)
- “Everything happens for a reason”
- “When God closes a door, he opens a window”
- “I guess God needed another angel”
- All well-meaning sentiments that end up having the same negative effect → whitewashing over someone else’s grief
- Minimizes it
- Dismisses it
- Can even add an element of shame to their grief à an element of “why haven’t you gotten over this yet?” or “why aren’t you looking for the good in the midst of the massive you-know-what storm that you currently find yourself in?”
- People say these things because so often, we don’t have words for grief – our own or anyone else’s – and yet we feel like we have to say something. For this reason (and because I am who I am), I always give people who are grieving this book by Jan Richardson: The Cure for Sorrow: A Book of Blessings for Times of Grief[2] → book of blessings/poems written by Richardson after the sudden loss of her husband
- 3 sections: “Getting the News: Blessings in the Rending,” “The Sweetness That Remains: Solace Blessings,” and “What Fire Comes to Sing in You: Blessings of Hope”
- All blessings/poems that deal with grief in words that are both very raw/real and very powerful/profound
- And I wanted to share one of those blessings to begin our conversation this morning. This is one called “Blessing for the Dailiness of Grief” from Richardson’s “Getting the News: Blessings in the Rending” section.[3]
- I wanted to share this blessing/poem this morning because I feel like it holds space for all different kinds of grief – grief that is fresh and grief that has been carried long, grief that is sharp and grief that is a dull ache, grief for any person or relationship. Particularly, it names the staying power of grief – how it can surface in the most seemingly-mundane moments of our days when we least expect it.
- American author Ann Hood: Time passes and I am still not through it. Grief isn’t something you get over. You live with it. You go on with it lodged in you. Sometimes I feel like I have swallowed a pile of stones. Grief makes me heavy. It makes me slow. Even on days when I laugh a lot, or dance, or finish a project, or meet a deadline, or celebrate, or make love, it is there. Lodged deep inside of me.
- I wanted to share this blessing/poem this morning because I feel like it holds space for all different kinds of grief – grief that is fresh and grief that has been carried long, grief that is sharp and grief that is a dull ache, grief for any person or relationship. Particularly, it names the staying power of grief – how it can surface in the most seemingly-mundane moments of our days when we least expect it.
- Difficult one because mourning is difficult
- I think these are important things to keep in mind as we talk about this second Beatitude this morning – Jesus’ blessings for those who mourn: Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.[4]
- Notice: it’s not “Blessed are those because they mourn” but “Blessed are those who mourn” – there’s a critical element of agency here → Jesus isn’t saying that the mourning itself is the blessing. Throughout the history of this Church, this particular Beatitude has certainly been twisted in many of the ways that we’ve already talked about – ways that goad and shame people into denying the emotions their feeling and instead try to “look on the bright side.” But I think that Jesus’ words are pretty clear: the blessing is not in the mourning itself but it what comes through the mourning.
- Casey Cole (in The Way of Beatitude): When Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn,” he does not speak of the condition of tragedy in itself, but rather of the capacity of a person to feel; blessed are those who care enough o cry. Blessed are those who are deeply moved by tragic events. Blessed are those who chose to love even when it would hurt a lot less not to love. For what does it mean to mourn other than to love in the face of loss, to persist in caring even when all seems hopeless, to refuse to move on easily or quickly from pain? When we speak of someone mourning, our focus isn’t so much on the events that caused the person’s sorrow as it is on the magnitude of a heart vulnerable enough to suffering with and for another. An uncaring heart does not mourn. Someone with no commitment, no vulnerability, and no self-sacrifice does not mourn. Only the one who loves, even when it hurts, is able to shed a tear. This is a blessed person.[5] → So one of the ways that we find blessedness even in the midst of grief and mourning is actually in the source of that grief and mourning: that person or relationship or experience for which we are grieving.
- Lyrics from “For Good” from the musical Wicked: So much of me / Is made of what I learned from you. / You’ll be with me like a handprint on my heart. / And now whatever way our stories end / I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend. / Like a ship blown from its mooring by a wind off the sea. / Like a seed dropped by a sky bird in a distant wood. / Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better / But because I knew you / I have been changed for good.[6] → The tracks the people leave on our hearts – the ways that they change us – are both a blessing and the reason we grieve.
- Casey Cole (in The Way of Beatitude): When Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn,” he does not speak of the condition of tragedy in itself, but rather of the capacity of a person to feel; blessed are those who care enough o cry. Blessed are those who are deeply moved by tragic events. Blessed are those who chose to love even when it would hurt a lot less not to love. For what does it mean to mourn other than to love in the face of loss, to persist in caring even when all seems hopeless, to refuse to move on easily or quickly from pain? When we speak of someone mourning, our focus isn’t so much on the events that caused the person’s sorrow as it is on the magnitude of a heart vulnerable enough to suffering with and for another. An uncaring heart does not mourn. Someone with no commitment, no vulnerability, and no self-sacrifice does not mourn. Only the one who loves, even when it hurts, is able to shed a tear. This is a blessed person.[5] → So one of the ways that we find blessedness even in the midst of grief and mourning is actually in the source of that grief and mourning: that person or relationship or experience for which we are grieving.
- Jesus also makes it clear that the blessing is in the comfort we receive in the midst of our grief
- First and foremost, comfort from a God who has been there, too, and who hunkers down with us in the midst of our mourning → reason for choosing our psalm for this morning
- [re-read Ps 30]
- Psalm that names the power of grief as well as the ups and downs of grief
- Psalm that names the even greater power of God to reach down into our grief and hold us
- v. 1: “You pulled me up”
- v. 2: “You healed me”
- v. 3: “You brought me up from the grave, brought me back to life”
- v. 11: “You changed my mourning into dancing”
- Notice that there’s no timeline attached to any of this. There’s nothing in our psalm that says, “In just 2 short months, God, you turned it all around for me.” There’s nothing that says, “Less than a year later, God, you dressed me up in joy.” Despite the way society might push us to “get past” our grief, there is nothing in our psalm that puts a deadline on any part of this process. What it does promise, though, is that God is there in the midst of it with us. It promises that when we call out to God, God will hear us and be with us, enfolding us in mercy and lifting us up.
- Beatrice Smith (in her Beatitudes Bible study): Whatever the cause of our mourning, God makes a profound and beautiful promise through the Lord Jesus Christ: [God] will comfort you. The one who is called Immanuel, God with us, comes to us; in our mourning, in our sorrow and in our pain [Jesus] reaches out his hand and offers us grace, comfort and hope.[7]
- But God is not the only place we find comfort in the midst of our grief. Often, we also find that comfort in the community that surrounds us.
- Family and friends
- Neighbors
- Church/body of Christ → To share in our lives together – to share our prayer requests and the ins and outs of our days together – is one of the greatest blessings of being in Christian community together, and it’s a blessing that this congregation shares well and often. We lift one another up in prayer. We reach out to one another. We check in with one another. We cry with one another and hold that sacred space for one another’s grief. And that kind of community, friends, is both a holy calling and a special kind of blessing.
- Paul speaks of this in his 2nd letter to the Corinthian church: May the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ be blessed! He is the compassionate Father and God of all comfort. He’s the one who comforts us in all our trouble so that we can comfort other people who are in every kind of trouble. We offer the same comfort that we ourselves received from God. That is because we receive so much comfort through Christ in the same way that we share so many of Christ’s sufferings. So if we have trouble, it is to bring you comfort and salvation. If we are comforted, it is to bring you comfort from the experience of endurance while you go through the same sufferings that we also suffer.[8] → We’ve all experienced our own times of mourning. We’re all shouldering grief in some way. And through the blessing of this community – through the blessings of the other relationships and communities in which you find your own belonging and solace – we get to share that blessing of comfort with each other.
- Fr. Cole: This is what it means to mourn. To follow Jesus, … [we need] to be a people with the capacity to love through sorrow. … We are a people who love even when it hurts. We know that our shared sorrow only brings us closer together in greater empathy, and we know that a heart that feels is a heart that can heal and reconcile. When we love so freely that we allow ourselves to be heartbroken for others and healed by God, we are on the way of Beatitude.[9]
- Paul speaks of this in his 2nd letter to the Corinthian church: May the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ be blessed! He is the compassionate Father and God of all comfort. He’s the one who comforts us in all our trouble so that we can comfort other people who are in every kind of trouble. We offer the same comfort that we ourselves received from God. That is because we receive so much comfort through Christ in the same way that we share so many of Christ’s sufferings. So if we have trouble, it is to bring you comfort and salvation. If we are comforted, it is to bring you comfort from the experience of endurance while you go through the same sufferings that we also suffer.[8] → We’ve all experienced our own times of mourning. We’re all shouldering grief in some way. And through the blessing of this community – through the blessings of the other relationships and communities in which you find your own belonging and solace – we get to share that blessing of comfort with each other.
- First and foremost, comfort from a God who has been there, too, and who hunkers down with us in the midst of our mourning → reason for choosing our psalm for this morning
- In this vein, I want to share another of Jan Richardson’s blessings with you to close this morning. – read “Blessing the Tools of Grief”[10] → Truly, friends, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” Amen.
- Notice: it’s not “Blessed are those because they mourn” but “Blessed are those who mourn” – there’s a critical element of agency here → Jesus isn’t saying that the mourning itself is the blessing. Throughout the history of this Church, this particular Beatitude has certainly been twisted in many of the ways that we’ve already talked about – ways that goad and shame people into denying the emotions their feeling and instead try to “look on the bright side.” But I think that Jesus’ words are pretty clear: the blessing is not in the mourning itself but it what comes through the mourning.
[1] Mt 5:4 (NRSV).
[2] Jan Richardson. The Cure for Sorrow: A Book of Blessings for Times of Grief. (Orlando: Wanton Gospeller Press), 2016.
[3] Richardson, 42-44.
[4] Mt 5:4 (NRSV).
[5] Casey Cole. The Way of Beatitude: Living Radical Hope in a World of Division and Despair. (Notre Dame: Ave Maria Press, 2022), 18-19.
[6] Stephen Schwartz, “For Good” performed by Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel, from Wicked. (New York: Universal Classics Group), 2003.
[7] Beatrice Smith. The Beatitudes: Eight Reflections Exploring the Countercultural Words of Jesus in Matthew 5. (London: Spring Harvest, 2023), 11.
[8] 2 Cor 1:3-6 (CEB).
[9] Cole, 25-26.
[10] Richardson, 135-136.
Fearfully and Wonderfully Made 